A Bigfoot skeleton is unearthed!

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A Bigfoot skeleton is unearthed!

 
 
In 1971, inspired by "Bigfoot" stories in his favorite tabloid magazine, the Weekly World News, Clayton Bailey made a ceramic skeleton of an 8 foot humanoid, and claimed that Dr. Gladstone, the eccentric scientist had discovered proof of the existence of Bigfoot. His neighbors and friends helped him discover the bigfoot skeleton, and dropping; in his backyard ,which was handy, and it eliminated travel expenses. Seasonal mudslides on the nearby hillside even eliminated the need to dig. According to press releases issued by Dr. Gladstone, the skeleton represents a race of giant man-like creatures that possess nature's perfect birth control device, the Triple Jointed ****. Gladstone explains, Human males have a single penile bone; whereas Bigfoot has a triple-jointed bone that can make a "U" turn, and deposit its sperm outside the female. This handy and efficient form of birth control explains the rarity of Bigfoot today. The triple jointed **** also suggests that Bigfoot was able to engage in athletic mating practices without damaging the bone, and this inspired the creature's scientific name, "Giganticus Erectus Robustus ". Analysis of the bones reveals that they are made of thermally metamorphised mud; much like the clay that Bailey uses in his studio. 

http://www.claytonbailey.com/bigfootskeleton.htm

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FINDING THE BIGFOOT DROPPING:

This exhibit explains Dr. Gladstone's approved method of Finding the Bigfoot Dropping, and shows the tools and techniques he has devised especially for this purpose. The exhibit explains:
1- A generous amount of lubricant is squirted into the suspected dropping site (a patch of fur) with the Lubricant Injector .

2- When the dropping emerges, it is grasped with the Dropping Extractor Tongs, and carefully withdrawn.

Another sign warns: "Try not to disturb the Bigfoot".

 
 

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COMPARATIVE ANATOMY
 

 The Triple-Jointed Bigfoot **** is nature's perfect birth control device.
Human males have a single penile bone; whereas Bigfoot has a triple-jointed bone that can make a "U" turn, and deposit its sperm outside the female. This handy and efficient form of birth control explains the rarity of Bigfoot today. The triple jointed **** also suggests that Bigfoot was able to engage in athletic mating practices without damaging the bone, and this inspired the creature's scientific name, "Giganticus Erectus Robustus ".

Peter Byrne, the former Director of the International Wildlife Conservation Society in Washington, D.C., commends Gladstone in 1975, saying; "Keep up with the good work. The world needs more people like you, and we are behind you 100%."